


Strange beginnings

by Striderella



Series: D&D:  Swaps and buckets [1]
Category: Hiveswap
Genre: Cherubs - Freeform, Choose Your Own Adventure, Lusus, Multi, Siblings, Trolls, drones, hiveswap - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-05-23 17:13:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14938470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Striderella/pseuds/Striderella
Summary: You accidentally get sucked into another dimension.  Do you end up on a 1990's version of Earth or Alternia?





	1. Sibling one.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the start of a new collection that carries on from D&D based on Hiveswap. For this introduction, I thought you could have a choice between ending up on Earth or Alternia. Enjoy.
> 
> PS Don't panic, I still have Homestuck goods coming.

Thud... 

Crash…

"OW!"

What appears to be an old lamp hits your head. You are ______ _______. You don't want to get majorly into it but you are a human with weird biological traits who for some reason was on the run from a demonic cherub along with your sibling and as a result, had to hide in strange worlds called "dream bubbles" housing various dead aliens. If that wasn't confusing enough, you spend a lot of time navigating their complicated romantic intentions and you also have to deal with the living who often visit with the departed. 

Now the bad guys have been defeated and the game has been won, you and your sibling rule over the "Dead kingdom" as the bubbles are now called along with a couple of dead trolls. Since you don't appear to age or die here (well you can die but you simply come back as a ghost so honestly, what would be the point?) you have literal eternity to waste. Most days as royalty, you tend to be bored, sitting on your fancy throne trying to look regal when all the time you just want to put on some sweatpants and binge watch my Tiny Hoofbeast on Trollflix. It is very dull work as nothing ever happens anymore. Occasionally, ghosts randomly get sucked into this weird black hole thing but there isn't much you can do about that. Sometimes you get to escape bubble life and visit the other Kingdoms located on Earth C. When that happens, you like to visit Dave and Karkat over at the Troll Kingdom for terrible romcoms or sick rap battles, or you play fiduspawn with Gcattarvossprite over in the Consort kingdom. Today however you are in the Carapice kingdom doing a favour for your dear sweet friend, Calliope. 

With all of your free time, you have become a dab hand at a new trend on Earth C called "Clutter culling". After dejunking your own hive, you have completed the homes of nearly all your friends. Dirk was very grateful for the organisation of his smuppet drawer which you begged him never to make you do again. GHB actually loved his new club rack you made him which he then painted himself. You do not wish to know where that paint came from. Damara even got you to tidy the tavern. It looked very classy for a week… that was before Dualscar threw Cronus through the window. Sigh. Never mind. Soon, everyone was asking you to sort out their hives and that was why you are at Calliope's place today. While she is out for dinner with Roxy and Jane, you promised to clear her basement. 

Wow… just wow. This place is insane. So many sketchbooks, old broken pieces of furniture, and very old boxes of candy. Do cherubs never throw anything out? You were moving a set of purple covered photo albums marked with Capricorn symbols when the lamp took a flying leap at you. Your weird blood pumps out of the wound on your forehead. Crap, maybe Callie has some plasters. Best to move the lamp to a safer place before you go searching her abultionblock. 

You pick up the lamp and notice something odd. Covered in cobwebs is a strange circular device. It has a snake head on one side but the other looks broken off with a bunch of wires sticking out. A broken key sticks out of a keyhole in the middle. You thought in your studies of different aliens with Aranea, you had covered nearly everything about Cherubs but you have no idea what this is. You better not mess about with it. It could be important or dangerous. Maybe both. You go to pick up another box and…

"Avalanche!"

Pelted with sketchbooks as the box breaks apart in your hands, what are the odds that one will hit the key and activate the device? This could only happen to you. Before you can curse worse that Karkat in heat, you find yourself flying through space, screaming loudly but only for a minute before things get worse. The beam of light you are traveling along flickers off and you free fall through space and time until you hit something hard and pass out.

You wake up with something wet against your skin...


	2. Sibling two

Your name is _____ _____ and being royalty is AWESOME!

You and your sibling, who you share a rare genetic condition with, have gone from orphans on the run from a scary-alien-antichrist-guy to ruling over bubbles full of dead aliens while wearing fancy crowns and sitting on shiny thrones. This is the very short version of the story. 

You and your sibling are now King and Queen of the Dead Kingdom and you love every minute of it - Helping out your bestest friends every day, living in an awesome palace with such delights such as a faygo filled swimming pool, private cinema, and walk in fridge filled with the most amazing snacks you can remember, all while sticking two fingers up at Meenah on a daily basis which is a major bonus (you even got the gardeners to shape two huge bushes so they were always flipping the bird towards her creepy moon palace)! The best part is because most things here can be achieved by thoughts and memories, you hardly have to do anything! Most of the work you do involves sitting around in fancy robes while assigning your closest troll friends various tasks and making rules before your robot butler you had Darkleer make you hand-feeds you blue M&Ms. You don't particularly love the blues ones but you hear it's what the rich and powerful like.

Your sibling has gone out for the day to the Carapice Kingdom to help a friend so today you are running things alone. Luckily very little needs doing. First, Cronus wants a law passed that no one is allowed to throw anyone else, regardless of being dead or alive through windows. He takes a while to read his statement as he finds it hard to hold the piece of paper he is reading from with the only two fingers not in plaster. You point out that if he would stop hitting on Mindfang every night, Dualscar wouldn't take so much offence. 

Next, Meulin and Kurloz ask you to legalise "it" yet again while raising their eyebrows up and down. You still have no clue what the hell they are on about since catnip isn't even illegal. It's catnip!

Kankri wants more trigger warnings at the bottom of all public loadgaper signs. He takes up most of the morning with this. You agree to have more put on.

Finally, Latula complains that she couldn't go into a public loadgaper because she keeps hitting her head on all the trigger warnings. You agree to have them taken off.

It's all easy to deal with and by the afternoon, you are pretty much all done. Time for a nap, a "My Tiny Hoofbeast" marathon, and a barrel of M&Ms. Wait…just now, a Carapice post master you have never seen before is being announced by the royal guard. The poor thing is barely four foot tall yet is pulling a large crate at least ten foot high behind him like a champ. You are quick to offer your assistance and a glass of faygo to the poor thing. You may be royalty but you haven't lost your manners. The PM gratefully glugs down the beverage and wipes down his little brow. You sign the paperwork and ask a couple of the Jade bloods to look after the exhausted little buddy while you investigate the crate. You read the note.

"TO FATHEAD. HERE IS A LITTLE SOMETHING FROM uS TO u. HOPE u FuCKING CHOKE ON OuR GENEROuSITY."

PS... HoNk ;O)"

Oh gee, it's lucky you have all eternity or else you will never be able to guess who it's from.

You feel about under your throne where you keep various weapons, snacks, and cards and pull out your trusty crowbar "Lady Bringer of the Fuck" (you had all your weapons ordained the day you were crowned.) You press your ear to the wood to make sure no ticking is taking place. Wouldn't be the first time that little green monster and his troll bitch have tried to blow you in more ways than one. When you are sure it is safe, you crack open the box. This was your first mistake. 

Your second upon seeing a weird circular broken portal in cherub colours with wires sticking out and spitting sparks was turning a key in the middle with a label that says "I FuCKING DARE u". How the hell are you supposed to ignore that? It's like asking you not to breathe or eat little sugar coated pieces of chocolate.

Finding yourself flying randomly through space wasn't the problem. It was only when you stopped flying and started falling very VERY fast. You screamed as the air whooshed passed your ears and then…

…nothing.

Time to wake up. Your head hurts. You don't have to open your eyes to know your mutated blood is decorating your face and the ground. You feel something wet against your skin…


	3. Earth.

Open your eyes. 

A dog licks at your wound and tries to wake you up. It seems nervous. Less like it is worried about you and more like you are both in danger. You push your hand into the ground and notice that the grass between your fingers is green. You must be on Earth…somehow. The dog is whining. You scratch behind it's ear and read the name tag. 

"Tesseract". 

What kind of name is that? You could imagine Horuss or Equius naming some hideous musclebeast robot that but a cute fluffy dog?

"I am not saying all of that. I will call you Tess. How's that?" you ask the pooch. It wags its tail to indicate that this is acceptable. The dog gives one last slurp before it suddenly jumps and scurries back into what looks like the fort knox of dog houses. Wow. Whoever built that had skills. 

You look behind you only to see some huge weird monster flapping its wings behind you and screeching. Quick as a flash, you arm your strifekind weapon of choice and, as it dives at you ready to swallow you up, you knock it baseball style into next sweep. As you watch the sucker bounce off the roof of the big house, you notice that there is indeed a big house. Whoa, this is a fancy place. It looks somewhat Victorian except for the green ray of light shining through the roof. If it wasn't for all the horrible creatures now coming towards you, you would swear this was…. No. 

No way. 

There is nothing like this on Earth C and both Earth A and B were destroyed as part of that stupid game your friends played. No time to ponder on architectural design as you are about to be dinner to some really creepy monsters who have a bone to pick with you about their buddy. You have three choices. 

a) Hope the dog has enough room for the both of you in that kennel of steel.  
b) Make a run for the big house in the hope that it's not full of monsters too.  
c) Take everyone on and hope the spirit of Bruce Lee suddenly takes you over.

You are thinking that your best option is d) Get eaten and return to the bubbles ghost style.

Suddenly a bolt of red light bursts through the sky towards the same spot the green light is shining from. All the creatures turn to look up. You notice a shape moving fast along the new beam. It looks like a person with…HORNS! What in the bubbles is going on? 

"Psst...Hey you, hurry!"

You look around but see no one. It is official. Caliborn blew you up somehow and now you are having some sort of breakdown before you return as a ghost.

"Pssst…Don't give away my position! Just come up!"

You look above you and notice a large tree house. A human male in glasses is gesturing to you. You point to the dog.

"She's alright. I took precautions. You won't be though. Now get up here already!"

Before the monsters get a chance to remember what they were doing, you scurry up the tree. 

"Thanks" you say. "Which Kingdom is this?"

The boy looks at you. "I'm sorry, I don't know this code."

"Kingdom! Is the the Human Kingdom? I need to get word out to King John or Queen Jane."

"Damn" said the guy. "I wish I had a cool codename like that. I should have thought of that. I'm Jude! Are you with the government or a private agency? You certain can't be one of the lizard people. Not with a swing like that…". He offers you a Pringle. You look at the design on the tube. It's the old one you remember from childhood. From YOUR Earth. No troll horns anywhere. It's not possible. This isn't a bubble. You have no memories of this place and however hard you try to remember anything, you can't leave.

You look at the wall of his treehouse and see a calendar. 

"1995". It all fits.

You really ARE on Earth. But how and why?


	4. Alternia.

Open your eyes.

A strange creature licks your wound. It looks like a lion but with a unicorn like horn. You recognise it from somewhere but you can't place it. As you push yourself off the ground, you notice that the grass between your fingers is blue. This is Alternian grass. It's only found in the Troll Kingdom. This must mean… of course! You are in the Troll Kingdom! You can just go and find Dave and Karkat and everything will be okay and they will bandage you up and feed you snacks. The animal before you is a growlbeast. You recognise it now. Similar to meowbeasts but with manes and horns, they are extremely rare and only provide for mutants who otherwise would have been born with olive blood. You look around for its ward only to see the crushed remains of a mutant blooded troll under a fallen wall. The creature is distressed at this sight.

"Oh you poor thing" you sniff, wrapping your arms around the creature. "Don't you worry. I am sure your friend is now in my Kingdom." The growlbeast looks at you sideways as if it understands what you are saying but at the same time has no idea what you are talking about. "I am sure if we can get out of here, we can find them. Would you like to come with me…um…" you read the name tag on the beast's collar.

"_______?"

Suddenly a rocket shoots past you and hits the remains of the hive you are outside of. You suddenly feel yourself being picked up in the air and being placed on the back of ______. Your new pal runs as fast as lightning as you hold on, begging for the horror terrors to spare you as you both weave in and out of the bombs landing on the hives below them. Terrible figures float around in the sky. You recognise them from some art Nepeta and Terezi made once. Drones. But Karkat outlawed drones. What are they doing here? It is then you realise... 

"This isn't the Troll Kingdom!". 

You know you every inch of Earth C kingdoms and you have NEVER been in this neighborhood before. You would have recalled a neighborhood on fire with rustbloods and lusi screaming as drones gunned them down. Where the bubble are you?

You are so lost in this realisation that you and _______ nearly collide with another lusi running in the opposite direction. This one appears to be some crazy dog/deer crossover. You have never seen this one before but that is not what catches your attention. Riding it is another human. A girl your age with short messy head and a confused look on her face.

"I'm sorry! I didn't…I wasn't…" she tried to form a sentence. Both of you are in shock as spotting another human here seems a bit like finding an ultra rare pog in a tube of pringles.

"What is going on?" you ask her over the sound of an exploding lawn ring, "Is this Earth C?"

"Um…no…" she says looking at you like you just grew an extra head. "My name is Joey. I am sorry, can we do this another time? It's just that I have to go save some alien and then find my way home. I don't have time for side quests or whatever this is. You can come with me if you like. We can both go back to Earth after helping my friend. This "Alternia" place is awful!". The weight of that word hits you harder than any flying debris falling around you.

"DID YOU SAY "ALTERNIA"?", you spit at her, nearly choking on your own tongue. You can't believe it. Alternia survived the game? But how?

"I don't have time to explain but we are on some weird alien planet and I really have to go and save a weird alien so…bye!". She speeds off. 

"Hey wait!" you shout out after her. How are you here? Have you travelled back in time? Was that portal a time machine? What are cherubs doing with such devices and what is going on?


End file.
